Wednesday, April 1, 2015

The Scar Destroyers to appear in Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens...but who will play them??


Star Wars: Episode VII - The Force Awakens will be coming to a theater near you on December 18, 2015.  It will be the first Star Wars movie in theaters since The Walt Disney Company bought the Star Wars franchise.  And it has just been announced that Dramedy Productions' own Star Wars characters, the Scar Destroyers, will be in the movie!  However, with this announcement has come a bit of controversy.

The five Scar Destroyers characters were originally created by a different person each to play in Star Wars: The Roleplaying Game by West End Games.  Then, years later, a movie based on the characters was made, but in some cases, the characters were played by people who did not create them.  Then, in the sequel, some of the characters changed actors again.

Dramedy Productions doesn't pay its castmembers.  The actors are in it because amateur filmmaking is a hobby the partakers enjoy during leisure time.  But some of the actors have quit playing or never even started playing characters that they created or didn't create.  But now, Disney is willing to pay the BIG BUCKS for some actors to play the Scar Destroyers.  And so now, all the various people who have ever had anything remotely to do with these characters now suddenly want to play them again or for the first time!  So Disney faced a really, really, really tough decision about who to cast.

So let's run down the list of the five Scar Destroyers characters and the actors who played/never played them:

1. PENZAR GRAT
Tracy Walters created Penzar Grat for the RPG and played him in both movies, so no choice needed here.

Tracy drinking an alcoholic beverage after making his millions playing Grat.


2. BEN WOLF
Ted Millikan created Ben Wolf for the RPG and played him in both movies, so no choice needed here, either.

Ted, living LARGE on the millions he made playing Wolf!


3. LEX NOVA
Jeremy McNutt created this character for the RPG, but he left Dramedy years before the movie started production.  So Kevin Shelby played Nova.  Who should play Nova now??

Jeremy (happy Captain America)?? Or Kevin (happy lumberjack)?


4. ROBERT KRAIG
Jon Boon McNutt created this character for the RPG.  McNutt left Dramedy years before the movie started production, so in the movie series, Kraig was played by Dylan Kinney.  (McNutt did return to Dramedy after filming began and had other roles in the movie series.)  However, Kinney dropped out of the second movie before finishing it, even though the footage he filmed was still used in the movie, to hilarious results.  So who should play Kraig now??

Jon (Weird Beard)?  Or Dylan (Weird Beard with java?)


5. JON BON NEBULA
Jeremy Howard created this character for the RPG.  Some time later, though, he dropped off the face of the earth.  So Mitch Trotter agreed to play the character.  Then he dropped off the face of the earth, too.  So we had to cast someone else.  That someone was Jay Chipman.  Chipman left Dramedy before the sequel, though, so Donny Byrd played him instead.  So who should play Bon Nebula now??

Actually, we don't know who's who in this picture, they all look so much like Jon Bon Nebula!

Well, don't get stressed out, because Disney has made a judgement in the casting fiasco.

They have decided that picking an already-made character template in an RPG and then giving that character a name does not constitute much of a "creation," so the "creators" are out.

This means Kevin Shelby will play Lex Nova.

As for Robert Kraig, Disney finally realized that Kraig can't be in the new movie, because in the Scar Destroyers sequel, Kraig turned to the Dark Side and so then got brutally and horrifically murdered by Penzar Grat, Ben Wolf, Elan Rai, and Miko Von Edward's ghost.

And as for Jon Bon Nebula, see who gets to play him in the new movie here!

McNutt brothers banned from making any more Dramedy Productions Star Wars movies

Scott McNutt, who played Jedi Master Miko Von Edward in Star Wars: Quest for Vengeance, and his brother Jon Boon McNutt, who played Elan Rai in Star Wars: Beware the Dark Side, have been banned from appearing in any further Dramedy Productions Star Wars productions.

The Walt Disney Company, which took over the Star Wars franchise in 2012, has recently discovered a picture taken at The Hall of Presidents in Walt Disney World in Florida of the McNutt brothers disrespecting a part of the park.

The McNutts, having fun with the Prez


Disney sent the following to Dramedy Productions about the picture:

"After seeing this picture, we must respectfully request these two heathens no longer be allowed in your Star Wars productions.  We must protect our properties, both theme parks and movie franchises, as best as possible."

Dramedy Productions then released its own statement:

"We will comply with your wishes.  Scott McNutt's character, Miko Von Edward, is dead anyway, and as for Jon McNutt, there's a different actor playing Elan Rai in every movie, so it's no big loss with either of these actors.  We really couldn't give a shit."

As for the McNutt brothers, they weren't too happy and released their own statement.  But we must warn you, their statement is NSFW (not safe for work).  But if you dare, you can read their statement here.